Love Yourself
At times, our identities are limited to our bodies. People often remember us by our shape instead of our names, remembering us as “that big girl” or “that skinny guy.” It is hurtful because body dissatisfaction is immensely common. Personally, prior to this year, being reminded of my body was extremely discomforting. I wanted to hide it and refused to acknowledge it, but then quarantine happened.
Quarantine left me isolated with my body, which was, in every sense of the word, a nightmare for a 17-year-old girl. I continuously faced myself in the mirror, much to my chagrin, but I gradually grew to appreciate my body for what it is. Freckles, acne, scars, stretch marks — all became normalised, and, though I still struggle with my outward appearance, I do not hate it.
Body positivity is a movement that presents a girl like me an opportunity to feel good about myself, and it can do the same for you. Rather than emphasising change, like losing or gaining weight, appearing smaller or taller, it wants to celebrate you as you are. It is a social movement that grants people the platform to love themselves unrepentantly.
ALLYSON LOWE // FLAT HAT MAGAZINE
In short, all bodies are good bodies.
This has been my mantra recently, and I have been experimenting with clothing. As a plus-sized individual, I am supposed to abide by a list of rules where clothes are concerned. No horizontal stripes, for fear they would make me appear bigger, no bright patterns to attract attention to myself, meaning I should always dress darkly for a “slimming” effect. Others likely faced similar obstacles; for instance, I remember girls in middle school wanting so desperately to wear the oh-so adult kitten heels to the middle school dance, but they “couldn’t” because they were “too” tall. Boys, too, shied away from t-shirts that emphasised their arms since they “didn’t have the muscles for it.”
There is not an adjective available that can justify telling a person they cannot wear an article of clothing. No one is “too” or “not enough” of anything to present themselves in a way they find beautiful. Our bodies are good and deserving to be decorated with how we see fit. I love tie-dye, a — shocking — bright pattern, and I wear tie-dye tees regularly. Now, I tuck my t-shirts into my denim skirt, which unashamedly reveals the stomach I was told for so long to hide. You should wear that outfit you feel vulnerable in because that insecurity will fade, and in its place will emerge confidence and a sense of power.
Being kind to yourself is difficult. Obstacles stand in the way, such as the images the media broadcasts. While there is more diversity now than ever, popular media still does not entirely accept different body types. We are almost punished for variation, being told to conceal or change ourselves to comply with societal standards that are, oftentimes, unachievable. While now incorporating a range of body types, popular media still panders to the message of change. Happiness is equated with looking different, pushing the narrative that changing that one little thing will unlock this new life, the “life you were intended to lead.” How you are now is the way you were meant to be.
ALLYSON LOWE // FLAT HAT MAGAZINE
Body positivity primarily focuses on caring for your body as it is presently, so take care of yourself. Begin a daily ritual that makes you feel good. For me, that’s washing my face every morning and night, and taking a walk. Everyone needs to take time for themselves, especially in the age of “Zoom university.” Computer fatigue is real, and facing a computer for a considerable amount of time can bring forth feelings of incompleteness and laziness. My weight has always been a topic of conversation, where others find it necessary to comment on my dietary habits or the size of jeans being double digits. Initially, when quarantine began, I was sensitive about my weight because I was not as active as I had been previously.
Being confined to a space naturally results in weight gain, but I felt I was just another fat girl who was succumbing to her bad, fat habits. That wasn’t true, though. I had not developed any “fat” habits but was just feeling the effect of a national pandemic, and because I have been told my body is wrong, I thought I was wrong for not being as active. This was not being kind to my body and internalizing negative emotions about it; I felt it was “bad” for adjusting to a new lifestyle, where my movement was limited to the house and my workplace.
In the wake of quarantine, it is important to remind yourselves of this, too. Be nice to yourselves, your bodies and foster personal growth. If you haven’t already, give body positivity a chance. Appreciate yourself for your natural beauty and celebrate the body you were given. Every line and curve is beautiful, and though I can only speak from my experience as a plus-sized woman, embracing myself as I am improved my mental and physical health.
“IN SHORT, ALL BODIES ARE GOOD BODIES”